I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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