You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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