Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
