a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Randomize
