We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
