Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize