508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
