I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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