just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
you will always have a special place in my vag
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
