it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Randomize