This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
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