Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
time to smoke my breakfast
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
