i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
If I had your ass I would rule the world
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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