Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
