I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
party gras won. party gras always wins.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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