But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Randomize
