you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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