A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
he just fucked me for my cheese..
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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