i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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