The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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