hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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