ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
