Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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