you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
