John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
