if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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