I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
