It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
