why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
