i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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