I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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