Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Randomize
