She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
