it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
