Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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