Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Randomize
