Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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