guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
