i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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