She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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