i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
