i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
