perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
