I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize
