I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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