What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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