It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
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