Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
i think im in europe. pls send help
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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