K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
