Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it

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(860): View more from Connecticut

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

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(858): View more from California

I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."

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(702): View more from Nevada

Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.

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(706): View more from Georgia

Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.

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(560): View more from

I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.

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(609): View more from New Jersey

You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!

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