I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
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